INTERVIEW: RESHMA
Rat World sits down with the vibrant, energetic, and fiercely ambitious RESHMA ahead of her new single release, ‘Where My Asians At?!’. We chat multilingualism, finding your community, and feminine rage. This interview will also be featured with exclusive new content in our upcoming Issue Six! Be sure to keep an eye out for it’s release in August/September…
A huge thank you to Bigpop Studios for welcoming Rat World into their space.
Rat World: Who are you and what do you do?
RESHMA: Hello, kia ora, apa khabar! My name is RESHMA and I am 25 years old. I was born in Malaysia, raised in Malaysia, but partially raised in New Zealand as well - so I've got a bit of that duality going on. I am a singer songwriter, mainly in the pop space. I am also a secondary school Music and English teacher in South Auckland.
I'd love to ask how you feel your career as a teacher has informed your creative practice.
RESHMA: I think teaching is a profession that requires you to have a lot of strength in yourself and to know who you are - these kids will say anything and point out everything! So, if you can withstand that; if you can answer their questions in a way that is assuring to yourself, then that confidence translates to the music world. Teaching has really assisted me in being confident in the work I am doing, and I’m really grateful for it.
Wow, that’s so cool. So, you have just released your newest single! Can you tell me about it?
RESHMA: Yes! So the song is called ‘Where My Asians At?!’ and it is the first of, what I would hint at, an upcoming collective of songs that speaks to my identity and my duality within the music industry. My brand of artistry is code switching: I use lots of different languages and try to almost mask them in this Western sound as a way to normalise the use of mother tongue in music. ‘Where My Asians At?!’ has English, Malay, Tamil, Mandarin, a little bit of Cantonese or Hokkien. The song is about the stereotypes and struggles that I have faced, not just from external communities but also from within my community - the stigma of being an artist, or creative within the Asian community is quite overwhelming. I am very blessed, though, to have parents who respect hard work. For them, they would have never supported what I wanted to do, unless I showed that I was working hard for it. So, the song speaks about that too. And it's just a really cool way to express where I'm from, and to get people to know where I'm from, and to explore some of the challenges that I've faced within the music industry. Also, it’s a bunch of Asian people having a lot of fun! I wanted to create an energy of excitement so people can feel encouraged to ask these pertinent questions and start these conversations.
I think it's so cool that you're showing bilingualism and code switching through this song. Considering that the majority of the population is bilingual, or multilingual, there is still a lot of stigma around speaking multiple languages.
RESHMA: Absolutely, and it's really awesome to have code switching in this song, because I get a bunch of people now coming up to me and being like, “apa khabar!” And it’s like, I love that! Kia ora! It’s such a great exchange of identities.
That must feel awesome. So, the song is titled ‘Where My Asians At?!’ - What was the defining moment for you, where you asked yourself that question?
RESHMA: I re-migrated back to New Zealand in 2020. So the story is that I was born in Malaysia, migrated when I was around seven or eight, re-migrated back to Malaysia, and then re-migrated back to Aotearoa. So it's a bit of a back and forth. When I came back in 2020, I had already built a career in Asia. And that was what I thought community was - people that have the same ideas as you, that look like you, that speak the same language as you. But, coming here, I was confused as to why the music landscape seemed so inaccessible. I remember Googling: “how do I become a famous pop singer in New Zealand?” and honestly, my chances were looking really slim. It doesn’t help that I’m a minority female from an Asian sector that isn’t a big population in Aotearoa. So I thought, how do I go about this? How do I search for other Asian creators within the community when there’s no collective? Where do I start? Because, at that time there was no community in the creative sector for Asians. So, do I wait for it or do I create my own bubble and start my own conversations? That is what led me to write this song. I literally wrote everything I wanted to say in like 20 minutes. I was in this rage-write.
I love that this stemmed from navigating personal experiences.
RESHMA: Yea. And the idea is that I’ve always been someone to encourage conversation. I've never been offended at someone asking me certain things - There's definitely been the casual racism on the side, sure - But I try not to take the position of getting offended.. So, hopefully this project can get people to consider these questions in the first place: Where are the Asian creatives in Aotearoa?
It’s awesome that you’ve phrased this issue as a question - You’re asking people to consider these things actively and to spark a conversation. You also brought up rage just before, and I know that this song talks a lot about feminine rage. What does feminine rage mean to you?
RESHMA: I think there has been this stereotype that, as women, we go with the flow a lot more, you know? We stay put, or we pick a career and we stick to it. There’s this idea of the demure woman. I remember even back in Malaysia, people telling me that I’m such an aggressive singer.
Oh, I totally feel you on that. Being too much of a go-getter, being too ambitious, is often seen as too ‘aggressive’ for women.
RESHMA: Or it's like my friendliness is interpreted as overconfidence, or as being flirtatious, when in reality, I just really liked people! I really like connecting with people. Initially, I thought I would fall into the ballad or commercial pop world to express more of my femininity, but it doesn’t feel like me. Even when I’m talking, it’s very much in that realm of passion. For me, feminine rage is about an authentic expression of self. It doesn’t mean anger either. I’m not an angry person - I’m really cheerful. However, the energy in my songs is really important. I want it to be empowering and visceral. That’s what feminine rage is to me.
Absolutely. I think the intensity that you bring to your music is such a powerful energy.
RESHMA: My intensity is also a little playful too. It’s very cheeky sometimes.
It’s cool that you’re exploring this idea of playfulness, because it’s often more acceptable for men be cheeky than women. Jumping off what you’ve been saying - has making ‘Where My Asians At?!’ been a cathartic experience for you?
RESHMA: 100%. I have this duality of where do I belong? Do I belong back home? Do I belong in Aotearoa? Because I’ve been a minority in both spaces, music has been the most comfortable way to express myself. This song melds the two worlds together to create an identity that I’m very proud of now. I’m bringing what I'm familiar with to the table, rather than changing who I am to fit into those spaces. I feel like I’m creating my own path and I encourage others to do the same: If there’s no space for you, then create it! I definitely think this might be how my parents raised me, but I’ve never been one to claim defeat. I didn’t want to be like every other pop singer, I wanted to be authentic. I feel like the release of ‘Where My Asians At?!’ has opened a door for me to delve into my title, my artistry, and my identity a bit more. I’m really pleased that it's finally coming out. And nervous. But I also find myself thinking, oh wow, listen to all these languages I grew up with. That’s really cool. And actually our clothes are beautiful. The things I know from back home are beautiful. You don’t have to compromise, you know
“I’m bringing what I'm familiar with to the table, rather than changing who I am to fit into those spaces. I feel like I’m creating my own path and I encourage others to do the same: If there’s no space for you, then create it!”
Yea, I totally feel you. Growing up in between countries can often be really confusing. Did you ever have difficulties reconciling with your sense of cultural identity?
RESHMA: Absolutely. I left Malaysia at an age that was quite important and I never really grasped the Malay language while I was there. And then I never really grasped the normalcy of how people use English and Māori and Pasifika languages in Aotearoa because I kept moving back and forth. But when I went back to Malaysia and entered Akademi Fantasia - a reality competition series - it was all in Malay, so I learnt the language out of necessity. I’m so grateful now because I recognize the importance of having that close to my heart and being able to speak with my family. It almost feels like a superpower. And because I’m teaching at a South Auckland school, I’m learning so much more about Māori and Pasifika languages too. I’m so grateful to be in a position where I can comfortably explore the two worlds of my identity instead of fighting to pick one or the other.
Yea, and as a mixed person, I love the sentiment you have about being in both worlds. You don’t have to give up any aspects of yourself.
RESHMA: Absolutely.
Hey, so how old were you when you entered the Akademi Fantasia competition?
RESHMA: I was 18 and I am officially the youngest person to ever compete in the entire 13 years of the show. And I was the only full Indian female to ever compete. It's so wild too because Malaysia has a huge population of Indian people.
What made you do it?
RESHMA: I was at this place where I didn't have the means to get singing lessons, but I wanted to learn. So I entered as many competitions as I could in order to get feedback and build my skill set
Wow. You really are a force to be reckoned with.
RESHMA: I'll take it! Anyway, I threw myself into all these competitions - just small ones at the mall where you could win a 100 ringgit shopping voucher. Then I stumbled across the Akademi Fantasia audition and I really didn’t recognize the scale of it. So, when I told my parents they were like, are you sure you want to do this? Do you know what this means? You’ll be taken away from society for eight weeks and you’ll live in a house with no access to the outside world. And I was like, yea I’ll be fine! But the competition is purely in Malay, so I had to push myself to learn. So, while everyone else was chilling in their downtime, I’d sit with a dictionary and transcribe words from the songs that were given to me for the week. That hard work really came through. I placed third.
That’s amazing. Did you always want to do this? Is this your dream from when you were a kid
RESHMA: I really enjoyed singing from a young age. Yeah. I think the first thing I ever wanted to do was be a marine biologist or a lawyer.
Oh, my God, I had the exact same career plan as you. Except I didn’t end up a singer.
RESHMA: That’s so crazy. Actually, heaps of people I’ve met in the Asian community actually say those two jobs too! So, I initially wanted to do something along those lines. Then I started doing more music stuff, like singing through the church and singing at random events - family, weddings, choir. Then I entered the show. And at that time I had also started my degree in English and Creative writing. I wanted to pick something that wouldn't limit me to one career, so I was like, I could use English for songwriting! There was a lot happening - I was doing the show, uni, and working as a singer at the same time. I’ve always lived my life in a really high stress, high functioning sort of way. But if I wasn’t enjoying it anymore, I wouldn’t do it. And I actually did take a break. When I first migrated back, I disappeared off the internet for like a year, just re-assessing and reflecting on why I wanted to do music. And I've come to that conclusion now, which is why this song is happening!
There's such an assuredness that I love about your personality. I also absolutely loved the ‘Where My Asians At?!’ music video. It was so fun! Everyone was just enjoying themselves so much and it made me smile. But there’s also a very particular aesthetic to it, something almost nostalgic and familiar to me. I was wondering what your inspirations were for the aesthetic and vibe of the video?
RESHMA: I managed to actually make that music video a reality because of Auckland City music. I received the Equaliser Grant which meant I could work with a female director in the New Zealand creative scene. I got paired with Jolin Li which is kind of perfect because she’s Singaporean and I’m Malaysian. So, we decided to experiment with the editing style and VFX aesthetic from back home. Honestly, what stops a lot of creatives, especially people who are not from Aoteroa or who want to experiment, is lack of capital. We had the capital and it meant we could be like, fuck it! Let’s do everything we can! Let’s have the most fun - let’s book a food court, let’s reach out to Rina Chae (who is iconic), let’s get as many POC people on board to come and create this thing. I really enjoyed that energy. People were so buzzed and passionate about what the song meant to them. And of course we had people who weren’t POC on set, but we were able to have conversations about it, which is exactly what I wanted to happen.
That’s awesome. One thing I need to ask: How the hell do you write a catchy song? I listened to your song and then couldn’t sleep that night because it was completely stuck in my head!
RESHMA: For me, I do a lot of stream of consciousness writing.
Do you start with the lyrics first or the melody?
RESHMA: The bulk of the lyrics come first and then I insert the hook later. I start with all the important stuff I want to convey, and then I see how I can tie all this information into a song that will be memorable. A lot of this stuff actually comes out in the moment, like, I don’t tend to reflect on the writing process or edit for months. I think there must be a reason why I wanted to write this down at that moment. I believe it’s like an energy transfer. Even when I record my songs, I don’t do it line by line. I do it chunk by chunk because I want the energy of that moment to be there. For me, it’s about what I want to say and how I can say it effectively.
That’s so interesting that you start with the message and then build the song around that.
RESHMA: That’s why I tend to work with a lot of producers. I let them know the vibe I want - grunge, pop - they come up with a beat and then we have this iterative process about what we are feeling in the moment. It’s all about going for it.
I can't wait for the rest of this collection. I guarantee that every song will be stuck in my head.
RESHMA: I hope so! You can definitely expect a lot of unknown but known motifs. A lot of new words and new lingo, dare I say…But it’s all very understandable because the bulk of the song is in English. I often recognize that when my multilingual friends speak to each other, they will replace one word in a sentence with a different language. And it’s like, why do I still understand it? Because of the context! That’s what I hope for my songs to do: take one word and stealthily switch it out. It’s a cool way to open the door for normalized bilingual/multilingual vibes.
“That’s what I hope for my songs to do: take one word and stealthily switch it out. It’s a cool way to open the door for normalized bilingual/multilingual vibes.”
And what are you listening to at the moment?
RESHMA: Babe Martin’s 'Knocked For Six In BHX'. Also a whole lot of Who Shot Scott. The energy is so catchy. Of course, Ersha Island二沙岛. The way they play with live orchestra instrumentation and melody? There’s a real - god, I’ve said this so much - duality to it.
Well, the concept is important to you!
RESHMA: 100%. But I also tend to listen to a lot of things from the 80s and 90s. The classics like Michael Jackson. All of my car tunes and playlists are just songs from the decades. I think it’s because my dad really enjoyed that music. I miss that kind of stuff.
Are you interested in exploring that nostalgic feeling in your own music?
RESHMA: Eventually. I want to get this identity project out of the way first. Tie it in a bow and then put it to the side. Then I really want to explore different genres and different styles of music. Doing it project by project is a really great process because I take it one step at a time.
What do you hope people take away from this single?
RESHMA: One thing I want people to take away is the beauty and power of collaboration, especially with people who are within your community. Honestly, just speaking with Jolin, and seeing the support that we got from the Asian community who just wanted to see us succeed was so great. Focussing on building those relationships with others, asking important questions and being open to conversations. I definitely came from a space of defensiveness around culture. I was really vulnerable and when people would ask me questions, I would just snap. But I realized that wasn’t helping people understand me and neither was it helping me understand other people. So instead, I’ve adopted this mentality of: let’s ask questions, let’s understand, let’s come to a consensus together. I really hope this song encourages people to have a conversation and to feel powerful within their own identity and their own skin
And lastly, what kind of advice would you give for young people, especially from minority communities, who are trying to make it in the music and music world?
RESHMA: I'm always so wary about giving advice because I just want to be so mindful of what I say. Give me a second to think…
Self assuredness doesn't come easy. I think, at least for me, living in the present and living in the moment, rather than worrying about the past, or the future, has really helped me grind. I don’t worry about the outcome, I just worry about the music that I wanted to create. Instead of wondering whether people will like it or if it will hit a million streams on YouTube, I focus on my craft and my identity. I think that a lot of people, especially in the time of social media, worry about the numbers and the stats. And as much as it is important, people enjoy authenticity. So, if you lose touch with the people around you and your community, your friends and family, because you're so obsessed with success, I think it’s a lot harder. Stay present, stay in the moment, connect with people. Being a musician is all about penning down life experiences and thoughts and feelings. How do you do that if you haven't experienced life? Go and experience life! Go on a roller coaster tomorrow, I dunno! Live. Hone in on your craft. Practice. Meet people and learn from them. Just focus on you.
“Being a musician is all about penning down life experiences and thoughts and feelings. How do you do that if you haven't experienced life? Go and experience life! Go on a roller coaster tomorrow, I dunno! Live. Hone in on your craft. Practice. Meet people and learn from them. Just focus on you.”
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Check out RESHMA’s new single, ‘Where My Asians At?!’ here!